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Alec Baldwin doesn't vacation...he
summers.
You call it khakis and a button up, Baldwin calls it casual
Friday.
You call it surf and turf, Baldwin calls it a continental
breakfast.
You call it a stroke, Baldwin calls it a minor
inconvenience.
You call it a tuxedo, Baldwin calls it slipping into something
more comfortable.
You call them white collar crimes, Baldwin calls them mergers and
acquisitions.
You call it a strip club, Baldwin calls it a petting
zoo.
You call it the Oscar’s, Baldwin calls it dinner with
friends.
Hip-hop was a drunken idea of Alec Baldwin in
1978.
You call it a bar fight, Baldwin calls it botched public
relations.
Baldwin doesn't bet, he places sure
things.
Baldwin was offered a cricket scholarship to Oxford but turned it
down to shoot a little film called Beetlejuice.
You call it flying first class, Baldwin calls it public
transportation.
You call it Buckingham Palace, Baldwin calls it, "Liz's
place".
You call it an Emmy, Baldwin calls it a paper
weight.
You call it Dancing with Stars, Baldwin calls it walking in
his sleep.
You call them degenerates, Baldwin calls them brothers.
The ratio of out of work actors to Baldwin’s is two to one.
Baldwin is more connected than
Siamese twins.
Enron didn’t collapse, Alec Baldwin sold his
shares.
Baldwin wasn’t born, he was
self-made.
You call it Baldwinisms.com, Baldwin calls it his
homepage.